Life with Dylan

Category: parenting

  • My son will always come first in my life

    Something I learned when I became a parent was that the needs of my child would take precedence over my own needs. I thought this would change as my son got older – and in some aspects it has, but not entirely.

    I am at a point in my life where I would like some things to change. I am thinking about a career change and a possible move, which would be a done deal if it was just me. However, I have a son and I will always be a parent first. So I must put on my mom hat, the one filled with rationality, before making any hasty decisions.

    Would it be fair to pull him from his school where is very happy? Would it be right to go back on promises of future vacations because a new job won’t give me the time off I have now? Do I just continue down the path we are on for a little longer? Maybe make some modifications, but no major changes?

    I’ve spent the last week thinking about nothing but the future and the changes that I will or won’t make. Countless hours on the internet looking at my options. Sleepless nights with tears of frustration, followed by 3-4 cup coffee mornings. Nobody ever said that being a parent was easy, but they also didn’t say how tough it was being a single parent.

    Every single choice I make will effect my son and I need to make sure that I am making the right choices. Not just what is best for me, but what is best for us – for my family. Now 10 years old, my son is still determining the path that I take in life and that is perfectly ok with me.

    Some people may think I am wrong for thinking this way, but my son will always come first in my life. He is a pretty incredible kid with some big dreams of making this world a better place. Making his hopes and dreams come true is my priority. I had 32 years to myself before him and in 8 short years he will be off to college – so for now there will be no major changes -we will continue down this path together. Laughing and loving every minute of our adventure.

  • An open letter to my son

    I have noticed a change in you recently and I believe that I had something to do with it. You have seemed a little calmer and a little less agitated when I ask you to do something. The tone of your voice isn’t always sarcastic when you talk to me.

    You say please and thank you. You give me a hug for no other reason than to say I love you Mom. In general, life has been much happier in our home.

    I began to notice these changes about the same time I started being there for you. Not that I wasn’t there for you before, but I realized that there is a difference between being in the same room working on the computer and just being there on the couch. I have spent very little time on the computer since my ah-ha moment, which means much less time telling you to wait a minute. Social media can wait – you can not.

    Ten years have already flown by and I find myself wondering where the time went. When did my little boy grow up? Then I think, oh yes, he grew up when I wasn’t watching – When I wasn’t there.

    Those days and nights when I was too busy writing a paper for school, or too busy meeting a deadline for my editor, or writing a blog post that just couldn’t wait another day.

    The times when Facebook and twitter took priority over you – That is when you grew up.

    For the past few weeks I have been able to relax at night. Flip through a magazine or work on a crafting project and be there for you – be there with you. We can talk or read together. I watch you play a game on the Wii and when you say mom, watch this I can. Or when you want to share something that you just read, I can listen to you.

    I’m here Dylan. For real this time, I am here.

    Here to watch you grow up.

    Here to listen to you.

    Here to spend quality time with you.

    Our weekends will be filled with less chores and errands – and more time together taking pictures, going on adventures, exploring nature, and of course lots and lots of zoo trips.

    It scares me to think that the next 8 years will fly by just as quickly, if not quicker, than the last 10 years did. My baby will be 18 years old before I know it and I don’t want to miss any more than I already have.

    I love you Dylan.

    Love,
    Mom

  • Endangered Species Monday – Educating children will change the world

    As much as I don’t want to believe this, educating adults is much more difficult than educating children. I guess its like the old saying goes – you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Or can you?
    As adults, we are sometimes stuck in our way of thinking and are challenged to think otherwise. Explaining the importance of an endangered animal to an adult means changing the way something has been thought about for years – sometimes decades.

    However, explaining the same thing to a child is liking flipping a light switch on. Suddenly a new way of thinking is introduced and a child will run with it – soak up the information like a sponge – and then release that information to anyone who will listen. A child craves learning new things and is eager to share what he or she has learned. Today’s children are the future of this planet. What my child does 20 years from now will either further the existence of current endangered species or continue to clean up the mess that we have made of this world.

    One of the best ways to educate a child is to give hands-on experiences. While libraries and computers are amazing and can teach vast amounts about why animals are endangered or have become extinct, there is nothing quite like seeing it first hand.

    Touching a rhino horn or ocelot pelt, holding a boot that was made from snake skin, these are the types of educational experiences that will become embedded in a child’s mind.

    Children are emotional thinkers. They see an animal being harmed and can relate this to a pet they may have at home or a charcater in an animated movie. Some, like my son, will go beyond the average persons level of involvement and ask questions that most adults don’t even think about.

    A great way to get your child the hands-on experiences about endangered animals is to visit your local zoo or aquarium. Many of these places have tables set up with pictures, artifacts, and games that make learning fun. You will be surprised at how much a child will retain and quickly repeat to others. So if you want to help save the endangered species, start by educating your child. Our children are the future leaders of this world and what they learn now will make a difference for many years to come.

  • Quiet mornings and beautiful sunrises

    Something I will be doing more of is getting up 30 minutes before my son. The precious time where nothing matters but me – yes, I said it – Me Time. Even if all I get to do is go to the bathroom, make my coffee, and watch the sunrise in peace and quiet then that will be good enough for me.

    This was my morning view from my bedroom window.  Beautiful, quite, peaceful.

    What do you do to get some me time away from the kids?